


All I Want For Christmas is You

by AnakinCaffrey



Series: Threads [4]
Category: White Collar
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Presents, Gun Violence, Hostage Situations, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 06:35:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5529608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnakinCaffrey/pseuds/AnakinCaffrey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Burkes celebrate Christmas after being faced with a situation that wasn't exactly ideal while shopping at the mall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All I Want For Christmas is You

**Christmas 2021**

Peter repeatedly told Neal that last minute shopping wasn’t wise, but Neal insisted that they take their time this Christmas. The twins were seven years old and Nicky was about two months away from turning twenty-two. Neal tried to get the twins to write a Christmas list for Santa and they’d scribbled down some ideas that Neal knew weren’t realistic, but he and Peter were going to try their best. Nicky wasn’t too old to get presents from Santa either and he knew not to spoil the fun for the twins. Neal’s rationale had been, “I know I spent extra time pretending Santa was real for you, so please don’t ruin it for them, okay?”

Since the beginning of December, Nicky and Trent had been having issues. Neal and Peter had no idea what was going on, but Nicky was always grumpy and didn’t particularly enjoy being around two seven year olds all the time. Neal and Peter were paying for his college education and he was still living with his fathers, but he just couldn’t stand his siblings when he was trying to get schoolwork done. Early in December, the twins had severely gotten on Nicky’s nerves. They’d been jumping all over him when he was trying to study for a few finals, talking nonstop about what they wanted from Santa and excitedly thought they’d even see Santa putting their presents under the tree.

Neal had gone into Nicky’s room just in time to imagine strangling his son. He’d managed to stop Nicky from telling the twins that Santa wasn’t real and the twins didn’t take any notice of the look Neal had given Nicky as they ran out of their older brother’s room and went to play in their own room. Neal was very sensitive during the Christmas season because he wanted to encourage the twins to believe in Santa as long as they could. The three of them had even drawn a bunch of pictures of Santa and his elves and reindeer.

Peter completely understood why Neal was upset with Nicky initially. Neal remembered one of his Christmases with Vincent, remembered that he’d been absolutely devastated when Vincent told him that Santa wasn’t real. Neal never wanted his own children to feel that way. That was one of the many reasons Peter loves Neal so much. He encouraged creativity and the child’s imagination. To him, it made Neal a very beautiful man.

A few days before Christmas, Peter was starting to go into panic mode. He’d taken it upon himself to do some Amazon online shopping for the kids after consulting with Neal about a few ideas he had. He also wanted to get something for his husband—something special. This year was their tenth Christmas as husbands. He and Neal had taken another vacation to Paris for their actual tenth anniversary, but Peter was trying to make this year special. They’d been married for ten years and he was extremely proud of that fact. Considering all of the times he could’ve lost Neal by means of death or as a result of his own stupidity when it came to controlling Neal or seemingly pushing him away, he was very grateful to still be with the man who loved him unconditionally.

Peter was lying in bed beside his husband at two-thirty in the morning, wide awake and unable to stop his mind from working. He didn’t have much time left to figure out what he could do for Neal and nothing was coming to him. He wanted something special, but he didn’t even know what would seem special. Neal’s not a materialistic man, so it didn’t necessarily need to be something he bought. Then again, he wasn’t going to promise Neal that they’d have some very exciting love made in their bedroom after the kids opened their presents on Christmas day. In the early years of their marriage, sex was a perfectly ideal anniversary gift. As time progressed, Peter wanted things to be less sexual and more intimate.

But what the hell would Neal like? His art therapist in training could probably use some more art supplies and art history books, but those seemed very…impersonal. “Fuck,” he muttered, shutting his eyes tightly as he let out a sigh of frustration. He had no idea what to do for Neal and the last thing he wanted to do was actually ask Neal. It wouldn’t be a surprise or very special if he asked Neal what he wanted for Christmas.

“What?” Neal murmured. He turned over to face Peter and could see, albeit blearily, that Peter was frustrated. He reached out and rubbed Peter’s chest when Peter sighed again. “What’s wrong, my love?” Peter didn’t answer him and Neal really didn’t like that. As far as he knew, things were fantastic between them. They hadn’t argued and neither of them said something to irritate each other for a long period of time. Had he not realized that he’d done something to frustrate Peter? Pushing himself up, he pressed his palm against Peter’s chest and stared directly at his face, asking, “What’s wrong?”

Peter decided to give in. Neal knew something was wrong and he knew Neal would think of the worst case scenario or blame himself—even if he truly wasn’t at fault. “I’m thinking about Christmas.” Neal nodded, gently rubbing Peter’s chest. Peter stared up at him sadly as he said, “I can’t think of anything to get you and it’s pissing me off. I wanted to surprise you and make this Christmas special for you since it’s our tenth Christmas as husbands, but I’m having a really hard time doing that.”

Neal let out a small, quiet laugh before smiling lovingly at his husband. “Don’t worry about what to get me, Peter.” Peter frowned up at him, wishing Neal would just give him at least one idea as to what he might want. Neal looked thoughtful for a second before asking, “Can I tell you what I want most for Christmas?”

 _Finally._ “Please,” Peter begged him.

The younger man leaned down towards his husband and kissed him sweetly. Upon pulling away, Peter was still looking at him expectantly. “You. I just want you.”

“But you’ve had me for twelve years. Isn’t there anything else you want?”

Neal smacked Peter’s chest playfully and snickered. “You honestly think I could ever want something more than I want you? These last twelve years have been wonderful with you.” Despite all of the bad things that had happened to them individually and jointly, he wouldn’t ever wish that he hadn’t gotten into a relationship with Peter. He crawled on top of Peter, straddling his waist, and leaned forward to kiss his husband. “All I need is you, Peter Michael,” he whispered against Peter’s lips.

In that moment, Peter desperately wanted to make love to his husband. He really appreciated it when Neal said such sweet things like this to him. Instead, he groaned and murmured, “Please just tell me you want a new shirt or something.”

The younger man let out a groan of his own and planted his face into the pillow beside Peter’s head. “You’re impossible,” he muttered. They were silent for a few moments. Peter trailed his fingers up and down Neal’s spine in the hopes that Neal would come up with something. “You know, there actually is something I want that would make this Christmas special…”

“Oh, thank God,” Peter said sarcastically. He figured Neal would say something sweeter about him and kiss him some more—also known as Neal prolonging Peter’s Christmas suffering.

“I’m actually serious this time,” Neal admitted, lifting his head out of the pillow so he could gaze at Peter’s face. Peter looked intrigued, waiting to hear this. “The last time we were at the mall, I saw some really sexy lingerie.” Peter already liked where this was going. This was something he could work with. “It looked like there was some Santa themed lingerie. If you’ve ever had a fetish for sex with Santa, now’s the time to do just that.”

Peter burst into laughter and Neal grinned at him. “Do you want me to surprise you or would you like to pick them out with me and you can pretend you didn’t know about them when I give them to you on Christmas?” he finally asked after calming himself down. Neal had snickered a few times, pressing kisses all over Peter’s face while the older man laughed.

Neal caressed Peter’s right cheek and murmured, “I don’t mind going with you. Matter of fact, I’d love to go with you.” Peter gave him a curious look. The little smirk on Neal’s face was an indication that he was going to crack some joke right about then. “People would probably look at you strangely—an old man buying lingerie.” By this point, Peter was nearing fifty years old. Neal’s fortieth birthday—four years ago—had been a blast, but Neal was honestly okay with the fact that his husband was almost fifty. However, Peter was very insecure about it.

As much as Peter liked the little smirk on his husband’s face, he really didn’t appreciate being reminded of the fact that he’s one year closer to dying. It was morbid thinking on his part and Neal was trying to brighten the experience for him, but Peter didn’t like the idea that he was likely going to die before Neal, which meant he’d abandon Neal—breaking one of his biggest promises to the younger man.

Peter stroked Neal’s thighs absentmindedly. He couldn’t even look at Neal at the moment and Neal immediately noticed that his joke had hurt his husband’s feelings. Allowing his gaze to flicker back up to Neal’s eyes, he knew Neal understood. “It’s all right,” he whispered.

“No, it’s not,” Neal challenged him. “I’m really sorry. I know how sensitive you are when it comes to that. I’m sorry for upsetting you.” Peter waved it off before resting his hand on Neal’s thigh again. “Don’t do that,” Neal pleaded, resting his hands over Peter’s. “You are absolutely perfect to me no matter how old you are, Peter. Despite what happened a few years ago, I do remember you telling me that we were going to be together forever, but forever wasn’t long enough—something along those lines.” The older man kept his eyes on Neal’s, seeing the apology in them. “‘Til death do us part’ doesn’t apply to us. I may have lost my memory, but I know that my love for you has only grown stronger. You and I have always been meant for each other. Death can’t tear apart what we have.”

“Wouldn’t you like someone younger, someone who isn’t going to die before you?”

Neal smacked Peter’s chest—actually smacked him rather than playfully swatting at him. “That’s not funny,” he whispered. “Don’t say things like that.” Peter frowned at him and insisted that it was true, which upset Neal. “You’ve been depressing yourself every Christmas for the last five years. Why the hell do you keep doing this?”

“Because I only have a limited amount of time to spend with you and I want to make every moment special.” Neal gaped at Peter and Peter wasn’t quite sure how to take that response. “You’ve always been my Neal and you always will be, but… When you lost your memory, I realized that our lives really are short. We only have so much time to be together. We only have so much time to make life enjoyable.”

“Then stop depressing yourself,” Neal snapped. “How are we supposed to enjoy the time we have left if you’re constantly dwelling on the fact that we’re eventually going to die?” Peter didn’t respond and Neal let out a frustrated groan before rolling off of Peter, flopping down onto the bed beside him and facing away from him.

Peter stared at the ceiling for a long time before he eventually looked at his husband’s back. The tension he saw there was unbelievable and Neal’s arms were crossed in front of his chest. Sighing quietly, Peter asked, “Are we still going shopping together?” Neal shrugged and Peter couldn’t resist turning onto his side. He traced Neal’s tattoo and it visibly relaxed the younger man after a few minutes. “I’m going later,” he whispered. “Will you go with me?”

Neal sighed, uncrossing his arms. “If you promise me you’ll stop being a dick about your age.”

“I promise.” Neal turned over and looked at Peter’s face. Peter scooted closer and pressed his lips against Neal’s, kissing him slowly. “I’m still young enough to make very passionate love to you in the lingerie we’ll pick out.” Neal managed to grin at him and Peter’s heart raced. He took Neal’s hand in his and intertwined their fingers. “As long as I live, my love for you and the love I make with you will always be powerful.” Neal shivered and Peter couldn’t resist chuckling. “I guess I still have some sexual appeal left—based on that reaction.”

“I’m just intrigued. I’d love some very powerful, unbridled lovemaking.” Rubbing his thumb over Peter’s skin, he whispered, “I think that’d be a great Christmas gift. No holding back—just taking the time to love each other and feel everything we can give.” Peter nodded. He and Neal had gotten more adventurous than Neal had ever been prior to losing his memory. It was an interesting turnaround and Peter struggled to accept it at first. He’d always been accustomed to being careful and sweet when it came to their bedroom activities. Now, he could essentially do whatever he wanted and Neal was all for it—encouraged it even.

In the last six years, Neal hadn’t had very many nightmares regarding his past. They still occurred here and there, but Neal had made peace with his past. Whether he remembered everything or not had no bearing on his peace of mind. He wanted to be at ease, to enjoy his life and be happy, so he chose to go down that path.

Peter had enjoyed the last few years simply because Neal _chose_ to be happy, to avoid situations that hurt him and their family. He wasn’t going to let his past haunt him until the day he died. He’d vowed to Peter one night that nothing could stop him from being happy. After making that choice, Neal had also chosen what he wanted to begin studying in college. He’d chosen to make his life better—and painted quite a bit as well—and he wanted to make other people’s lives better as well.

Art therapy hadn’t been something Peter thought Neal would consider as a profession, but Neal was determined to see it through. He was very focused on his studies, yet he still managed to create a balance between his education, his marriage, and his children. It also kind of helped that he and Nicky were going to the same college. Both of them were studying art, too. While Neal had chosen to take the therapy route of art, Nicky had chosen to work towards opening and running an art gallery that would feature Neal’s art as well as the art of any of Neal’s future patients—and perhaps even a few of his own pieces.

All in all, Peter was very proud of his babies. While Neal was an older student, he certainly had as much if not more determination and motivation as his son did. Peter had a hell of a time finding gifts for the two of them because he didn’t know what artsy men wanted. The last few Christmases, he’d given the two of them new canvases, new art supplies, and had even gone so far as buying actual art that they admired. Now, he had no idea what to do for either of them.

That was partly why he and Neal were going to the mall. He needed to get a few last minute things for the twins and Neal was going to help him find a couple things that Nicky might like. And, of course, they were going for themselves, too.

The two men laid as close as they humanly could. Even though they loved spooning each other, neither of them thought that anything could really beat having a head and hand on one’s body. In this case, Peter’s head was on Neal’s chest, just over his heart, and his hand rested on Neal’s stomach. “I love you,” he whispered to his husband.

Neal was stroking Peter’s hair soothingly, knowing Peter liked it as much as he liked having Peter stroke his hair. “I love you more,” Neal whispered in response. It wasn’t meant to sound like they were having a competition. It was just Neal’s way of saying he loves Peter more and more with each passing day. After exchanging their whispers of love for each other, a brief silence overtook their bedroom. Neal felt compelled to whisper, “Peter?” into the slight darkness. He still had the ability to see his husband thanks to the moonlight.

“Yes, honey?” the older man murmured sleepily against his husband’s chest, his hot breath warming Neal’s skin and heart.

“You don’t really have to buy me any lingerie tomorrow,” he admitted. “You know better than anyone else that I’m not materialistic. I know what’s important to me and I hope you know that, too.” Peter was smiling—Neal just knew it. Of course Peter knew what he was getting at, but he still felt the need to say it aloud anyway. “I don’t need any expensive—or cheap—gifts. I have everything I need in this house already.” Peter kissed Neal’s chest then and Neal smiled softly at the older man who took that moment to look up at him. No words really needed to be said after that. Their eyes could convey their feelings without words. For that, Peter was eternally grateful. Considering everything Neal had gone through since their relationship had begun twelve years ago, he appreciated that Neal could still look at him with genuine interest and affection. Despite not needing any words, Neal still wanted to put his thoughts and feelings out there by whispering, “All I want for Christmas is _you._ ”

•◊•

“Nick.” The twenty-one year old groaned and swatted at the gentle hand on his arm. “Nicky, I need you to wake up.” Again, Nicky groaned. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes and looked up to see his father looming over him with an uneasy smile on his face. “I have a huge favor that I need to ask of you and I know you’ll probably hate me for it.”

Resisting the urge to turn over and ignore his father, he asked, “What do you need, daddy?” Even with his mood swing throughout December, he still loved his family unconditionally. Even as a twenty-one year old, he still called his father ‘daddy.’ A few of his friends thought that was very immature and ‘gay,’ but Nicky didn’t care. As long as he lived, Neal would always be his daddy.

“Poppa and I need to do some last minute shopping,” he said quietly. Nicky let out yet another groan and Neal nodded, adding, “I know, I know. Please, Nick.”

“You’re leaving me with those two monsters,” he griped. “That’s not a favor. That’s a death sentence.”

Neal rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. Would you rather have two annoying siblings or be an only child?”

That always got Nicky. He hadn’t minded being an only child when it’d been just him and Neal. As he got older, he liked the idea of being a big brother. It wasn’t until Peter had come into their lives that Neal had finally agreed to the idea of having more children. Even though the twins got on his nerves and flat-out pissed him off, Nicky loved them to death and would do anything for them. “Want me to take them to the park? We could probably play in the snow for twenty minutes before they tell me they’re freezing and want to go home.”

Chuckling, Neal nodded. “I’ll give you the keys for the Corvette since you oh-so-nicely asked for it.” Nicky grinned at him. He liked driving his dad’s car and the twins loved being in it. “I’ll text you when we’re on our way home. As soon as we get back and hide everything, poppa and I will let you relax.” Nicky opened his mouth to say something, but it seemed like he didn’t exactly want to say whatever was on his mind. Neal didn’t want to prod him about it, but he was a little concerned when Nicky looked away from him. “Everything okay?”

“Can I ask you something? It’s…kind of a personal question.” Neal nodded, his brows furrowing as he took a seat on his son’s bed. Nicky pushed himself up a bit and kept his eyes on his father as he asked, “You and poppa always resolve your problems when you’re alone. Can I ask how you do it?”

Neal wasn’t entirely sure how to answer that, so he answered with a question of his own. “Does this have to do with whatever’s been going on between you and Trent?” Nicky frowned and nodded. “Listen,” Neal said gently, taking his son’s hand and rubbing his thumb over his son’s warm skin. “What works for me and poppa may not be what works for you and Trent. All I’m going to suggest is that you reach out to him, attempt to start a conversation about whatever’s going on, and actually discuss it with him.”

Hesitantly, Nicky whispered, “Can I tell you what we’re fighting about?” Neal nodded. He’d been hoping Nicky would finally open up to him about all of this. In fact, he was really hoping Trent would spend Christmas with them because he hasn’t seen Trent in quite some time. “The last time we went on a date, we went to his place. We talked and talked about all of this ahead of time, but…” Sighing, the twenty-one year old shook his head. “I don’t know if you realize it, but he and I are still virgins—or at least I am. We tried to do something that night and… I don’t know.”

“Did he pressure you into it?” Nicky shook his head. “Did something happen when you two were getting ready?”

Nicky nodded and began to blink quickly, an indication that this was really hurting him and he was probably going to cry. Neal kept his eyes on his son intently and opened his arms the second Nicky moved. He held his son against him and let Nicky cry quietly. Patience was the key here and Nicky obviously needed to cry it out a little. “We were getting undressed and then he got a text message from some guy. I don’t even know who it was, but I saw the message because I was topping and just happened to look at his phone.” Neal rested his cheek against Nicky’s hair and closed his eyes as Nicky whispered, “I read ‘hi, baby. I miss you.’ I think he cheated on me—or is cheating on me. It really hurt because I was going to willingly give myself to him.”

Neal felt awful. He was trying to put himself in Nicky’s position, but he didn’t have to try all that hard. There was some connection between the two of them that he couldn’t explain and he could just feel how Nicky felt. “I’m so sorry, baby boy,” he whispered, kissing Nicky’s hair. “You deserve so much better than that.”

“I want what you and poppa have,” Nicky said thickly. “I want to be loved the way you two love each other.”

Nodding against Nicky, Neal whispered, “You will be loved like this someday. Whether it’s Trent or not, you _will_ be loved like this.” He gently rocked Nicky against him, wishing he could take his son’s pain away. “Besides,” he added softly. “You have four people right here who care about you and love you so much. Nothing could ever change the way they feel about you.”

Nicky breathed shakily even as he nodded. “I know,” he whispered. “I know I’ll always have you guys. I’ve always had you, daddy.” He nuzzled his face against his father and squeezed Neal’s body gently. Neal smiled in response, wishing he could do more for his son.

“You will _always_ have me. My heart belongs to you.” Nicky sat back after a few moments and sniffled, wiping his face off as he stared at his father. Neal gave him a small smile and was relieved when Nicky returned it. “I love you, kiddo.” He leaned forward and kissed Nicky’s forehead. At first, Neal thought that was enough, but then he decided to kiss his son’s nose as well, which, much to his delight, elicited a giggle from the twenty-one year old. “You were the first love of my life,” he told Nicky. “That much, I remember. You’re still everything to me, Nick, and I really hope you’ll find someone who makes you happy, someone who doesn’t hurt you.”

Nicky threw himself at Neal and hugged him tightly, whispering near his ear, “I love you, daddy.” Neal embraced his son and rubbed his back, enjoying the hug for however long it would last. “Thank you for being here for me.”

When they separated, Neal stroked his son’s floppy hair and said, “There’s no need to thank me. You are always welcome to talk to me or poppa at any time, Nicky. We love you to death and we worry about you when you’re unhappy.” Nicky nodded, knowing how true that was. He knew he could trust his fathers more than anyone else in the world. Neal has always been his safe haven, but he also knew Peter would do everything Neal had just done for him, too. “Poppa and I are going to the mall. Do you want anything while we’re there? We could make a detour and get some ice cream for you on the way home if you feel like eating your sadness away.”

Chuckling, Nicky whispered, “Will you eat the ice cream with me?”

“Of course, baby. Of course.” He took Nicky’s right hand in his left and gave his son a gentle smile. “Don’t let Trent hurt you. If he cheated on you, he’s not worthy of your tears. You should save those tears for someone who makes you cry because they love you beyond words.” Nicky laughed quietly. He knew Neal was just trying to make him feel better, but it was working. He’d seen Neal cry for a variety of reasons when it came to his relationship with Peter.

“You still cry when you’re sad or upset though.” Nicky added, “Well, not so much lately, but still.”

Neal nodded. “Well, whenever I cry, I know my tears are worth it. Poppa’s worth it. In the end, I know things are going to be okay.” Nicky absentmindedly stroked Neal’s rings and Neal whispered, “You need to find someone you love who has earned your love. If they love you as much as you love them, any tears are well worth it. For me and poppa, we’ve only gotten closer regardless of what’s happened between us.”

While Neal had been talking to Nicky, Peter had been standing outside of their son’s bedroom door. He’d heard every word and his heart ached for Nicky. Hearing Neal say what Neal said made him feel really good. Despite hating when he made Neal cry, Neal ended the conversation by justifying tears as a sign that you’re afraid to lose the person you love because they had truly earned your love. “Thanks, daddy,” Nicky said again.

Peter glanced in and watched Neal hug their son. “Don’t cry until they’re worth crying over,” he whispered. “When you’re loved as much as you love them, it’s worth it, but don’t cry over someone who doesn’t deserve your love or devotion.” Neal kissed Nicky’s cheek, adding, “When you find the right person, you’ll know it. I don’t know if things will work out between you and Trent, but don’t let him break your heart.” Nicky nodded. He was truly grateful for the fact that he’d grown up with a father who loved him unconditionally and was willing to talk to him about anything. “I love you, Nick. No matter what happens in your love life, just know that I love you so damn much. Poppa loves you just as much.”

“I know he does. That’s why I’ve always called him my poppa instead of my stepfather,” Nicky said quietly. That really touched Peter. He’d heard some really tragic stories from a few people in the past about how they resented their stepparent for replacing their actual parent and he’d also heard stories about being the stepparent who is resented by the stepchildren. In this case, he and Nicky had never really considered each other a step-anything. Since Peter had fallen in love with Neal and Nicky, Nicky has always been his son. Even if he didn’t tell Nicky that in the past, he would always consider Nicky his son.

Nicky asked that Neal get going so they could do their shopping and be home soon. Before Neal had the chance to leave his son’s bedroom, he asked if Neal was serious about the whole ice cream thing, to which Neal replied, “Hell yes. If you want to sit on the couch and watch a movie or something while eating ice cream to soothe your sorrows, I’m more than happy to do it with you.”

Peter chuckled quietly as the two of them gave each other one last hug before Neal left the bedroom and startled at the sight of Peter. “Hey, angel,” he whispered to Neal. Neal relaxed and could only smile when he heard the affection in Peter’s voice. He knew Peter had overheard everything and he didn’t mind. It was good for Peter to hear these things even if they weren’t said directly to him. “Thank you for talking to him. I’m glad he’s okay now.”

“He’s our baby.” Neal rested his hands on Peter’s chest, rubbing over his pectorals gently. “I know you want him to be happy as much as I do.”

Peter nodded, taking Neal’s hands in his own. “I do and I know you made him very happy. Now, though, I need you to get dressed for the weather. It’s cold out there and you freeze very easily.” Neal snickered when Peter said, “Not that I mind because it gives you so much more reason to let me warm you up in whatever way I can.”

“Only you could make something so sweet something so dirty,” Neal teased.

Peter tugged on Neal’s hands, pulling him towards their bedroom. “Oh, you haven’t seen anything yet, baby boy,” he whispered seductively, grabbing Neal’s ass the second they were in their bedroom, closing the door moments later as Neal giggled.

Nicky, in his own room, heard their door close rather loudly and he sighed. “Well, at least I don’t have to get out of bed yet…”

•◊•

Peter rubbed Neal’s wedding and engagement ring as he drove them out to the mall. He was so in love with his husband, so grateful to have him, and he sincerely hoped he was conveying that to him. Nicky came out of his own bedroom after they emerged from theirs and he just rolled his eyes at them before heading downstairs to wait for the twins to wake up. He’d watched the twins before and he didn’t really mind it. He was just in a foul mood and didn’t feel like dealing with two seven year olds. After talking to his father, he actually felt a little better. Knowing what his fathers did prior to leaving the house also helped. It gave him more hope that he could have what they have someday.

Glancing over at Neal while they were at a red light, Peter asked him, “Do I have to wait until Christmas to play with you in your new lingerie?”

Neal chuckled and nodded. “Yes. Patience is a virtue, my love.” He considered his own words for a moment before adding, “Although, you have expressed a great deal of patience with me.”

Peter squeezed Neal’s hand and murmured, “Don’t go down that road again.” Neal returned the gesture and gave his husband a small smile. Peter began to drive again, but he could sense the anxiety and uneasiness in Neal all of a sudden. Neal hadn’t gone in this direction in quite some time by his own choice. “Neal, it’s never been a matter of patience with you. I love you. Everything I’ve done, I’ve done because I love you.”

“I still appreciate all of the effort you have put into this relationship. I honestly wish I had something to do for or give you in return.” Neal bit his lip when Peter’s grip on his hand tightened uncomfortably. He immediately got the message Peter was sending and whispered, “I know.” Peter relaxed his grip then and Neal himself relaxed. “I just want you to know how grateful I am for everything. You’ve given me a home, a family, a _life_ since—”

Peter interrupted him, firmly saying, “All of this was yours before it happened. There was no reason to deny you your own family.” Neal nodded, watching Peter’s hand on the steering wheel. Peter was trying not to hurt Neal, but it was very obvious that he was squeezing the wheel now. “Why are you in this mindset all of a sudden?”

“I’m sorry,” Neal whispered. “I’ll stop.” Peter let out a sound of frustration as he turned the car towards the nearest entrance to the plaza. “I’m really sorry.”

“Just stop apologizing,” Peter said exasperatedly. “This is supposed to be a nice morning together. We’re buying gifts for the kids and for each other.” Neal nodded and glanced out of his window, watching the snow fall as Peter carefully drove them through the parking lot. “I’m not mad at you, Neal. I just wish I could make you understand sometimes. In the last six years, I have loved you more than I’d loved you before. Not once would I consider myself ‘putting up with you.’ You’ve been my husband for ten years and we’ve been together for twelve years.” Neal looked at Peter and watched him as he spoke. “I couldn’t be happy without you. If I’d put you in some kind of home or mental facility, I’d hate myself. As your husband, it’s my duty and my right to take care of you and give my love to you no matter what.”

Neal whispered, “I know and I love you for everything you’ve done for me. You’ve helped me so much. Between rebuilding memories and experiencing parts of my past that even you weren’t aware of, I have really appreciated going through this with _you._ ” Peter’s brows furrowed. He wondered why Neal said that, why he’d specifically said he wanted to go through all of that with him. “I don’t think I would have a quarter of the memories I have right now if you’d forced me to go through this with a counselor. You did so much for me, more than I expected initially. I’m just saying that I love you for not giving up on me.”

Peter pulled into a parking spot and put the car into park. As soon as he turned the car off, he turned to face his husband, lifting Neal’s left hand. Pressing a gentle kiss on Neal’s knuckles, he whispered, “You’re worth it. You’ve always been worth it.” Both men smiled at each other before Peter said, “Wait here.” Neal raised an eyebrow as Peter slid out of the car. He watched his husband come around the front of the car and giggled a little when Peter obviously stepped on some ice. Fortunately, he didn’t slip and fall. The second Peter was at Neal’s door, he opened it and held his hand out. “Mister Burke.”

Grinning broadly, Neal said, “Mister Burke,” took his hand, and climbed out of the car. Peter was thrilled that Neal humored him at times and Neal could see that. He shut the door and locked it as they were walking towards the mall. Neal looked up at Peter and really loved the way the snow fell on him. Peter, despite dyeing his hair a slightly darkened shade of brown, still had some gray hairs. Even though the older man would grumble and gripe about it, Neal loved it. He loved everything about Peter. “I’m so lucky,” he whispered as he let out a contented sigh and let go of Peter’s hand so he could lean against Peter and wrap his arm around Peter’s.

The older man smiled down at his husband. He loved this. Like Neal, he could appreciate the snow as it fell on his husband. It was a little chilly, but Neal’s warmth pressed against him was wonderful. Neal always had such a warm touch and Peter appreciated it during the winter.

As soon as they were in the mall itself, Peter looked around at all of the people—calculating every single way Neal could get hurt. It was an instinct now. Whenever they went out together, he watched everyone. Anyone who looked at Neal made Peter uneasy. All he wanted to do was protect his husband as he always promised he would. “Where should we go first?”

“We could get things for the twins since that’s nearby,” Neal suggested. Peter nodded and they started heading in that direction until Neal paused.

Concerned, Peter glanced at him. “Honey?”

Neal looked up at his husband and gave him a sheepish smile. “I kind of need to use the big boy’s room.” Peter rolled his eyes. That was how they’d potty trained Joey—saying ‘let’s go use the big boy’s room’ every single time. “Can I meet you in there?” He knew how anxious Peter was when they were out and about, but he could defend himself if need be. He still had some of his training engrained into his brain even if he didn’t think about it or remember it clearly.

“Go, but be quick. Sound good?” Neal nodded and kissed his husband’s jaw before releasing his arm. He quickly headed towards the men’s room and Peter watched him until he actually went in. Peter sighed and went into the toy store. He walked around aimlessly, thinking about what Joey and Brie would like. Neal would be better at this, so he wasn’t going to pick anything up until Neal came back so he could consult with Neal.

In the bathroom, Neal was quick to take care of his business. That wasn’t the problem. The problem was that, while he was washing his hands, he happened to look in the mirror and a man with a gun was standing behind him. Well, not exactly _a_ man. There were five men in total, wearing masks and wielding guns. “Isn’t it a little late to be dressing up? Halloween was a couple months ago.” The man directly behind him loaded his gun and pointed it at Neal and Neal watched in horror as he thought he was going to be shot and killed.

“We need you.”

Neal’s brows drew together as he asked, “Why me?”

“Because you happened to take a piss while we were getting ready.” Neal swallowed hard as the man nudged him with the gun. He complied, knowing it was better to work with the criminals until he knew the odds of his survival were better. If five men didn’t have guns pointed at him, he would’ve fought back, but he really wanted to go home to his family after this. “You got kids?” Neal nodded silently, his eyes focused on the gun the man in front of him was holding at his chest level now. “Then you’re perfect for the job.”

“What do you need me for?” he asked hesitantly.

The men chuckled and the one in front of Neal said, “We all forgot to get Christmas gifts early on, but we really don’t feel like paying for them.” Neal nodded, understanding what these men were going to do. “We’ll hit up the jewelry store first. If you work with us, we won’t kill you when this is over. I’m sure your kids will appreciate that.”

“I’ll work with you,” he said, managing to keep his voice steady. “I do want to go home to my kids. We can do this without hurting anyone.”

The man shrugged and said, “As long as no cops or security guards get in our way, we won’t have to shoot anybody.”

Neal nodded. His heart was pounding and he was truly afraid that he wasn’t going to make it out of this. After everything he’d been through in his life, he thought dying as a result of a gunshot was a really pathetic way to go.

One of the men, a bulkier man, stepped up and wrapped his arm around Neal’s neck, locking him in a vice-like grip. At first, Neal struggled, but he realized this was part of what they wanted him to do. After he relaxed, the man held his gun towards Neal and nodded at the man who appeared to be the ringleader in all of this.

Within moments, the six of them were exiting the bathroom and firing their guns at the ceiling. People screamed and got down on the ground when they were ordered to by the group of men. Neal’s eyes darted around, searching for Peter. He knew Peter would get help. Peter would _not_ let anything happen to him.

As he was dragged along, he hadn’t caught sight of Peter at all. That terrified him. He watched in horror as the employees in the jeweler’s store were frightened by shots that _barely_ missed them. “I thought you weren’t going to shoot anyone,” Neal stammered. His eyes were on the ringleader as he used the butt of his gun to shatter the glass above expensive necklaces.

“We didn’t hit anyone.” Neal, since he was standing still, happened to glance at an employee who _had_ been shot. She was crawling towards the button underneath the counter. It would silently signal the security guards and the police would eventually be involved as well.

Neal watched her with hopeful eyes. If she could manage to hit the button, they might get out of here alive. Unfortunately, his hope was for naught as one of the other men caught sight of her and immediately opened fire on her—with his automatic weapon. Neal screamed. He couldn’t help it. He’d just watched them murder a woman—a woman who probably had a family of her own that expected her to be home for Christmas. If she had children, they’d just lost their mother and that _hurt_ Neal. Being a parent himself, he couldn’t imagine what that would do to his children. He didn’t even want to imagine what it would do to Peter and Nicky specifically.

The ringleader gestured at the man holding Neal and the arm around Neal’s neck tightened. Neal gasped when a gun was pressed against his temple. He wanted to close his eyes, figuring that might make things a little easier. The shot never came though. “Keep him quiet. Face him towards the outside of the store so the cops can see we’ve got a hostage.”

Neal was gripping the man’s arm, struggling to keep it far enough away from his throat so he could breathe at the very least. Neal was panicking. This wasn’t going well. They weren’t supposed to kill anyone. Now that they had, he was afraid that they wouldn’t hesitate to kill him when his usefulness had come to an end.

People were on the floor everywhere. One woman was dead behind the counter and the other employees were in plain sight. Those who weren’t in the store itself were still on the ground since two of the additional men had their guns aimed at them. The man holding Neal had his gun pressed against Neal’s temple, the man who’d shot the woman to death was looming over the employees to make sure they didn’t cause any more problems, and the ringleader was stuffing as much jewelry into his bag as he could.

Neal looked at everyone as they stared at him fearfully. For all he knew, they probably assumed he wasn’t a hostage, assuming that he was involved. Neal had no idea where the hell Peter had gone. They honestly weren’t that far away from the toy store Neal had left him at—and he’d been gone a little longer than usual, so he expected that Peter would want to check up on him.

When Neal’s eyes locked with a little boy’s eyes, something in Neal clicked into place. Neal gripped the man’s arm roughly, twisted it, and managed to break free. Without realizing how he could have possibly done any of this, he had also managed to take the man’s gun into his own hands after putting the man on the floor. The other four men stared at Neal like he was crazy. One against four? The odds weren’t looking very good for Neal.

Having once been a trained FBI agent, Neal figured this was his training taking over. He shot the man who’d killed the woman behind the counter—and was surprised beyond belief when he realized he’d shot the man directly in the heart. He was moving without thinking, getting out of their direct line of sight while still attempting to fire at them. People were screaming all around him and his brain was overwhelmed. He couldn’t concentrate on any of this with all of their screaming.

Before he could get another shot off, he was hit by one of the guns—the gun itself, not a shot. His already throbbing brain hurt even more now and things became very dark until finally disappearing, taking him into the darkness.

•◊•

Peter heard the screams and gunfire, but he’d tried to find Neal. Where the hell was Neal? He’d burst into the bathroom to find that it was absolutely empty. _Where the hell was Neal?_ He was afraid that Neal had been taken from him again, but he didn’t know where to begin looking. When he heard more gunfire, he’d darted out of the bathroom and watched rounds come out of a nearby store. The screaming terrified him and he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t find Neal. He couldn’t find his husband, his soulmate, his best friend.

In what Peter assumed was less than two minutes following the multiple gunshots, everything was silent. The people outside of the store were on the floor and whimpering. A few brave souls were even trying to get away without bringing attention to themselves so they could escape. Most of them were frozen in their fear nonetheless.

When three men with guns emerged from the store, Peter’s heart raced. Moments after the three of them had come out, seemingly threatening anyone who moved, another bulkier man came out as well. Peter’s heart leapt out of his chest when he saw what the man had over his shoulder—or rather _who_ he had over his shoulder.

Neal was unconscious and it looked like he was bleeding. From this distance, Peter didn’t know exactly how much those monsters had hurt his husband. Glancing around frantically, he tried to find some means of saving Neal. He hadn’t brought his gun with him and he regretted that very much now. However, his gaze fell upon the emergency alarm. Without hesitating, he ran to it and pulled it.

Without skipping a beat, the alarms sounded and Peter watched as the men startled. They looked around to see if they could figure out who had pulled the alarm and Peter moved away from it. He lowered himself to the floor for a few moments until they turned away and then his mind began to work.

If he could get a gun, he could probably take the four men out and save Neal. The whole issue with that was _Neal._ Neal is unconscious, hurt, and the last thing Peter wanted to do was watch his husband die just days before Christmas.

Deciding that he couldn’t just wait for something to happen, he took off when the men were out of his general sight and headed towards the security room. Being an FBI agent certainly had its perks when it came to security. He always carried his FBI identification with him, so he was fairly certain the security guards wouldn’t question him when he asked them for a gun.

While Peter was working things out with the security guards on duty, Neal was finally coming to. He felt sick and realized he was being carried—and it definitely wasn’t by Peter. His hands were zip tied and he wasn’t quite sure how to escape them. He chose not to say a word until he was roughly thrown to the floor. “Ow,” he moaned, lifting his hands so he could rub his temple. He felt something on his skin, some kind of liquid. It took a few moments, but he realized what it was. _Blood._

“Oh, good. You’re awake.” Neal glanced up at the ringleader seconds before the man pressed his gun against the center of Neal’s forehead. “If you try any more stunts like the one you just pulled, I have no problem with blowing your brains out.” Neal stared up at the man in horror. He didn’t want to die. He didn’t want to leave his children and his husband. “Got it?” Neal nodded and the man harrumphed. “Good. Sit there and shut up.”

Neal glanced up at the man who’d thrown him onto the floor. As expected, the man’s gun was aimed right at him. He took a little pride in the fact that he’d, apparently, given this man a black eye. After what he’d done in the jewelry store, he was pretty impressed with himself. Granted, he was still a hostage, but he was impressed nonetheless. Without remembering his training at Quantico, he’d managed to break free of the man holding him and take that man’s gun. If he survived this, he’d be a little excited to share that experience with his husband.

Alarms were blaring, but the men didn’t seem like they were fazed by it. They kept looting even as the bag seemed to be nearing its maximum capacity. “It’s always pretty boys like you, isn’t it?” the man above Neal sneered. “I should shoot your brains out right now.”

Fearing that this man might actually do just that if he made a snarky remark, Neal kept quiet. Glancing beyond the man after said man looked away, Neal could see a news reporter and cameraman. He gaped at them because they were filming all of this as it was taking place and they _weren’t helping him._ What the hell kind of world was he living in when, around Christmas time, people were _filming_ a hostage situation rather than trying to _help_ the hostage?

He had no idea what was being said by the reporter, but it still pissed him off that she was using his dilemma to her benefit. “Get up,” the ringleader snapped at Neal. Quickly, Neal managed to get himself to his feet. Seconds later, the bulky man had gotten a little rougher with him and grabbed his hair, pulling him along as they headed to a different store. He understood that he’d severely pissed this man off, but his hair and scalp wouldn’t understand. “We need to hurry this up. I’m sure the cops have already been called and are on their way by now.”

“We could always grab another hostage…” one man suggested. Neal sincerely hoped no one else would be subjected to this. Fortunately, it didn’t seem like anyone—aside from that damn news reporter and her cameraman—was nearby.

A short distance away from the store Neal was being held in, Peter had rounded up any security guards on duty and the police had arrived fairly quickly as well. Coordinating with all of them to pinpoint where the robbers were now was chaos. Peter’s mind was wandering in several directions. Worrying about what was happening to Neal was his biggest concern. What if Neal wasn’t unconscious? What if it was so much worse than he thought it was?

“Agent Burke,” one of the officers said, drawing Peter’s attention to him. “You said there were several men and a hostage. Do we know who the hostage is?”

Peter sighed and nodded. The officer was waiting for Peter to tell him who it was and it was obvious that he was surprised when Peter said, “My husband is their hostage. Last I knew, he was unconscious.” He glanced between all of the officers and security guards that he’d gathered, hoping that they would all be willing to help him. He wasn’t so sure that he could take four of them without risking Neal’s life, so he desperately needed these men. “He and I came out to do Christmas shopping for our kids and…” Peter didn’t have to say any more than he already had. The second he’d mentioned their children, everyone was determined to see this through and aid in whatever way they could. No one wanted a child to be without their parent on Christmas.

After everyone was equipped with a weapon—whether it be a baton or a gun—they were ready to search for the bastards holding Peter’s husband captive. The second Neal was safe, he was going to pull him into his arms and never let go. Never. Not even if Neal wanted to use the restroom. After this, Neal wasn’t going to be allowed to use public restrooms unless Peter accompanied him.

In all honesty, it wasn’t very hard to find them. They were rather loud, speaking without considering that they were going to be found very soon. Cautiously, Peter led the group towards all of the noise. “One more store to go,” one of the men said. “Come on, pretty boy.”

In that moment, Peter caught a glimpse of his husband being pulled by his hair. Immediately, that pissed him off. His heart pounded as he watched those men take his husband away. Without hesitating a moment more than he already had, he dashed after them with the officers and security guards following suit. “Freeze!” he called out. All of the men immediately froze and turned towards him, but his eyes were on Neal. A gun was pointed at his head and he could see the fear in Neal’s eyes. That was a fear he hadn’t seen in a couple of years. “Let him go and we can do this the right way.”

The man holding the gun to Neal’s head hit Neal with the gun and snapped, “What if we don’t let him go?”

Peter watched the fresh blood slowly drip down Neal’s face from his temple. Too many times had he seen his husband injured. Too many times had he seen Neal beaten and broken down. This would not be another one of those times. He fired a warning shot with the gun he’d been given and grazed the shoulder of the man who was holding Neal at gunpoint. “I said: _let him go._ There are no other options.” Peter watched the man’s finger inch towards the trigger. Neal was beginning to sweat and Peter couldn’t let him go through this anymore.

Deciding that Neal’s life was worth so much more than a criminal’s life, he took another shot at the man holding Neal and didn’t miss this time. Because Neal’s body had been placed in front of the man like a human shield, Peter, unfortunately, had no other choice and shot him in the head. It worked, but he didn’t like what he’d been forced to do.

“Peter!” Neal cried out as the men pulled out their guns.

Neal ran to Peter and all Peter could do was meet him halfway and get him on the ground while the police officers took care of the remaining shooters. Those criminals had every intention of killing Neal if it came to that and Peter didn’t know if they’d killed anyone else already. Either way, he wasn’t going to risk the life of his husband or an innocent civilian by allowing them to continue looting various stores in the mall.

Peter was hunched over Neal on the floor, shielding him and holding him protectively. He could feel Neal trembling beneath him and carefully shifted away from Neal, allowing him to straighten up as well. “Honey,” he said, gently caressing Neal’s cheeks with both of his hands. While he was definitely trying to comfort his frightened husband, he also didn’t want Neal to look at the dead bodies and all of the blood that was now on the floor. “You’re safe now. They can’t hurt you.”

“I know,” Neal whispered, meeting Peter’s eyes.

Relieved by the fact that Neal was aware of his own safety, he pulled Neal into a bone-crushing hug, kissing his neck repeatedly once he moved Neal’s jacket out of the way. “You are never going to the bathroom alone again,” Peter whispered to him. Neal laughed quietly, rubbing Peter’s back slowly.”I’m so glad you’re with me again.” He wanted to hold onto Neal and never let go, but he figured Neal might need medical attention. Neal may have a minor concussion, his temple was bleeding, and his hair was a mess.

Neal nodded against Peter, whispering, “Thank you for coming to my rescue—again.”

Peter squeezed Neal a little tighter for a few moments before pulling back to look at his face. Giving Neal a gentle smile, he said, “No matter what, I will always come for you. I’m sorry that I didn’t come sooner…”

“I don’t care how long it took,” Neal admitted. “All that matters to me is that you came for me. You saved me.”

For a few moments, Peter thought about what they were going to do since shopping seemed a little out of the question now. He was going to take Neal to the nearest hospital and then he’d probably just take Neal home once Neal was cleared. For now, he just held Neal close. He realized Neal’s hands were zip tied together and he glanced around until he saw a security guard come over to them with a pocketknife. “Hold your hands out, sir.” Neal nodded, separating himself from Peter long enough to put his arms out. The man cut through the zip tie, freeing Neal’s hands. The second Neal’s hands had been freed, he threw his arms around Peter and held onto him as though he never wanted to let go.

•◊•

As soon as Neal and Peter returned to their home, Nicky and the twins barreled into Neal. Neal was a bit surprised by the sudden hugs from his children, but Nicky whispered, “I was watching the news when it was happening. I was so scared, daddy.” Neal kissed Nicky’s neck and wrapped an arm around him. Nicky held onto him as though he was still afraid and Neal really appreciated that.

Neal shifted them into the house a little more so Peter could close the door, but he held all three of them against him. “Daddy’s okay,” he assured them. He had a band-aid on his temple and he did have a slight concussion, but he was fine overall. Peter rested his hand on Neal’s back and smiled when Neal glanced at him. He’d kept Nicky in the loop while he and Neal were in the hospital and he’d texted Nicky when they were on their way home.

“I’m glad you’re okay, daddy,” Joey whispered against Neal’s stomach. “We were all scared.”

Nodding, Neal stroked Joey’s hair. “I know. Don’t be scared anymore, baby. Daddy’s home with you all.”

A short while later, they were all getting ready for bed and Peter was watching his husband in their bedroom bathroom. Neal was hunched over the sink and he looked disappointed—very disappointed. “What is it?” Peter asked quietly.

“If I’d just stayed with you, we could’ve come home with their gifts.” Peter shifted off of the doorframe and moved into the bathroom, wrapping his arms around Neal’s naked waist. Neal’s sleep pants that hung low on his hips were only going to be on temporarily—Peter hoped. “Instead, we came home with _nothing._ ”

“ _We_ came home though,” Peter murmured, planting gentle kisses along Neal’s spine. “There’s still a few days to go before Christmas, honey.” Neal sighed and Peter gripped Neal’s hips, tugging him away from the sink until he was standing up with his back against Peter’s front. Peter wrapped his arms around Neal again, resting his chin on Neal’s shoulder. “I’ll take care of it. You stay home with the twins and—” The doorbell suddenly rang downstairs. Neal turned and looked at his husband curiously.

Both men pulled their robes on and were, fortunately, still in their pants. They headed downstairs together and Nicky joined them as well. The twins were already in bed and probably asleep by this point.

Peter opened the door and there were several people standing outside of their home. He almost slammed the door shut on them, thinking it was a horde of reporters trying to get a story from Neal. What stopped him was the fact that everyone present had a few bags in their hands. “We heard you two had kids,” one of the women said. “After everything that happened at the mall earlier, we wanted to thank you both for doing what you did.”

Neal and Peter were both taken aback by the generosity of these people. They both actually remembered seeing them at one point in the mall now that they were looking at them a little more closely. Neal, Peter, and Nicky gratefully took bags that were handed to them and put them on the nearby couch. As soon as everything was brought in, Neal and Peter were absolutely breathless. Neal was emotional because he hadn’t expected anything like this. It wasn’t until Neal saw the little boy he’d seen prior to jumping into action that Neal became _really_ emotional. They boy came up to him specifically and hugged him tightly. “Thank you,” was all he said to Neal.

Peter watched the boy and his husband. He and Neal talked about a little boy and Neal’s experience with immediately reacting by retaliating against the men who’d taken him hostage and Peter figured this was that little boy. To that boy, Neal was a real hero. Even though Neal hadn’t been able to do a whole lot before he was knocked out, that little boy was grateful to him for what he had done.

After the little boy went back to his mother, Neal and Peter expressed their gratitude, thanking everyone and wishing them a Merry Christmas while giving them all hugs. Nicky watched his fathers and couldn’t help smiling. He felt like they definitely deserved this.

When both men returned to their living room after thanking everyone, Nicky saw that they were both tearing up. “That was… That was unbelievable,” Neal whispered as he wiped his face off. Peter smiled at him before hugging him tightly. They pulled Nicky into their hug since he was there and had helped them bring everything into the house. “I love you two,” Neal told them. Of course he loved the twins, too, but they were in their beds. Thank God. Everything here was going to be from Santa until they were older and Neal could tell them this story.

The three of them took everything up to Neal and Peter’s bedroom and then Nicky headed to bed. Neal and Peter sat on their own bed, still shocked and awed by what those people had done for them and their children. “Tis the season,” Peter said quietly. “I can’t believe this. This still feels so unreal.”

Neal leaned against his husband and Peter wrapped his arm around Neal, holding him close. They were both looking at the bags full of toys and clothing in awe. “It’s incredible,” he whispered. “They made sure we would all have a Merry Christmas of our own.” Peter nodded in agreement before kissing Neal’s hair.

Peter had planned on going out himself at some point to finish their Christmas shopping, but this pretty much took care of that. He was beyond grateful to everyone who thought of them when they did their shopping. Never in his life had he actually thought anyone would do this for them. He didn’t want to say that he and Neal didn’t deserve it. Neal in his own right was a hero. He’d allowed himself to be taken hostage so no one else would be. He’d cooperated with the criminals so no one had to be hurt. While one woman had been killed, the majority of the employees and shoppers had survived because of Neal’s cooperation. Peter didn’t think he himself had done anything heroic. All he’d done was gather police officers and security guards to help him take them out and save Neal.

When the two men locked their bedroom door and proceeded to make very passionate love, the only thing on their minds was that they were beyond grateful to still be alive and able to celebrate Christmas with their children.

•◊•

Christmas morning, Neal and Peter were woken up at six o’clock by two eager seven year olds and their ecstatic twenty-one year old. The two men had spent the better portion of the last few days leading up to Christmas sorting through the gifts. They didn’t blame the generous people for giving them an excess of toys and clothing for girls. In the end, any extras they had made perfect gifts for Elizabeth and Diana’s two girls. Their oldest, Elsa, was around the twins’ ages and their youngest, Anna, was about to be three years old next month. Diana and Elizabeth had seen the news about Neal and Peter in the mall and thanked both men endlessly for the gifts. Even better, they’d taken the time to wrap the gifts themselves. Both women knew what their daughters were being given, but they appreciated what the two men were doing for them.

Peter broke out the camera so he could record their kids. The second the twins saw how many gifts were under their Christmas tree, they squealed in delight. That brought immediate smiles to Neal and Peter’s faces. Nicky joined the twins on the floor and Neal was very happy to see that. Considering how Nicky had been feeling lately and his lack of Christmas spirit, seeing Nicky so elated made Neal a very happy daddy.

Peter sat on the couch and recorded the three of them. They were splitting the mountain of presents up amongst the three of them. He glanced up at his husband without taking the camera’s focus off of their kids. Neal met Peter’s gaze simultaneously and smiled at him. Without having to say a word to each other, Neal leaned towards him and kissed him. “I love you.”

“And I love you, my angel.” He rested his left hand on Neal’s left hip when Neal stood closely beside him. He could feel Neal’s eagerness and knew his husband wanted to get in there with the kids, but he was resisting his urge. Peter chuckled and rubbed Neal’s hip. “Get in there.” Neal shook his head and Peter retracted his hand, swatting Neal’s ass playfully. Neal yelped and Peter couldn’t help snickering.

“That wasn’t very nice, Peter Michael…”

“Go be a little boy with them,” Peter insisted quietly. He could see that Neal was still fighting the urge to jump into all of the fun with their children. “Go on, honey.” Nicky glanced up at his daddy. He was kind of hoping Neal and Peter would both come over, but he could see that Peter was recording them. After the events of his fathers’ experience with mall shopping, he’d made a little something for his fathers.

Neal finally gave in and darted over to the kids. He was so animated, pretending he’d never seen all of the twins’ gifts. Peter couldn’t help laughing contentedly as he watched his babies. Neal, even at forty-four, was an absolute riot when it came to things like this. Their kids’ birthdays and Christmases were always fantastic.

Watching their children open their gifts was beautiful. Both men loved seeing their kids so delighted. Brie was sitting beside her older brother and Joey was in Neal’s lap, letting Neal unwrap gifts with him. Peter couldn’t help the immense joy he felt while watching them—even Neal. Neal, to him, has always been a little boy at heart and he loved that about him. He’d always loved that side of Neal and he always would regardless of how old his husband was. Age didn’t make a difference. Neal getting into the spirit and engaging so animatedly with their kids was a beautiful sight to see.

After the kids had finished unwrapping all of their gifts and were off playing with them, Nicky went up to his fathers and asked, “Can you guys come with me for a second?” Curious, Neal and Peter followed the twenty-one year old back to their Christmas tree. Nicky reached back behind the tree and pulled out a large, rectangular shaped object. “I did something for you guys.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that,” Peter said quietly. He appreciated it, but he didn’t want Nicky to buy things for them. He and Neal both enjoyed the presents their children have and didn’t really require any of their own.

Nicky rolled his eyes and Neal chuckled. Peter and Neal both took the gift nonetheless and opened it together. As soon as they’d unwrapped it, they both stared at it in awe. “Nicky…” Neal whispered, glancing up at his son. Nicky gave his fathers a small smile when he saw how much they appreciated the gift. He’d painted it himself and thought it turned out quite nicely. It was a project he’d been working on for the last six months and had finally finished a few days ago.

It was a painting of Neal and Peter one Christmas. The five of them had gone out to play in the snow for a little while and Nicky had a brand new camera at the time that he was making the most of. While the twins had been playing, Neal and Peter had been holding hands and laughing quietly to themselves before Neal went to play with them himself. Eventually, Peter had joined in as well. The painting was of a moment between Neal and Peter that Nicky caught perfectly.

While both men had been covered in snow, Peter had been face to face with his husband and excitedly gripped his hips, lifting him up. Neal’s hands were on Peter’s shoulders and he looked so happy. Nicky caught that pure, simple joy between his fathers and, now that he’d painted that exact moment for them, he was glad to have done so.

In real-time at that particular moment, Peter was just about to spin Neal in a circle and lower him to the ground so he could embrace him tightly and subsequently kiss him passionately. Nicky remembered that moment very clearly and thought it was amazing, so he’d chosen to go through his photos a few months ago and snatched that one out of the pile. Six months ago, he had no idea when it would be finished. A few days ago, he spent a great deal of time on it so he could give it to his fathers for Christmas. Fortunately, it all worked out and he was so thrilled to see how much they loved it.

Neal and Peter went back to staring at the painting and Nicky watched their faces. Peter absolutely loved it. He always thought his husband and son were talented artists. Since Nicky had started studying art, he’d gotten a lot better. He was very proud of his son’s painting and he was so happy with it because it was something he’d done spur of the moment with Neal just to show his husband how much he loves him. He’d never imagined being able to actually look at that moment from Nicky’s perspective.

Neal, on the other hand, was getting emotional. Nicky actually liked when Neal responded that way. It made him feel good because he could bring his father to tears of joy. Together, the two men set the painting down gingerly, hesitant to part with it. They pulled Nicky into a hug and both whispered their thanks and love to their son. “We love it, baby,” Neal said after kissing Nicky’s cheek. “It’s beautiful—just like you.”

“Not to say that you haven’t in previous years, but you guys definitely deserved a gift this year.”

Just then, the twins had returned to find the trio in a hug that they wanted to be part of as well. Darting over to the trio, Joey wrapped his arms around Peter and Brie hugged Nicky tightly. “The best gift of all has always been my beautiful family,” Neal whispered. He kissed Nicky’s forehead and stroked the twins’ hair before giving his husband a sweet kiss. The four of them were the people he cherished most and, indeed, the greatest gifts of all. To the four loves of his life, Neal softly whispered, “All I want for Christmas is you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas, all! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season!


End file.
